Getting Relationship Counselling After an Unexpected Pregnancy

25 October 2016
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Having an unexpected pregnancy can put quite a strain on a relationship. Often the couple may have different emotions surrounding the pregnancy or even different preferences on whether to parent the child as a couple. It can be a good idea to get relationship counselling to explore these important issues in a neutral setting with a third party to guide the conversations.

Exploring emotions

It is very normal that people feel a range of emotions surrounding pregnancy, from delight and excitement to fear and anxiety. It can be very hard for a couple if one partner is feeling huge waves of excitement while the other is terrified. Counselling can help you to discuss these feelings as well as working out if there are any other issues that may be affecting how you are approaching this pregnancy, including reactions from your childhood to pregnancy in your family. Often having a chance to discuss the issues openly can help both partners to see the other person's viewpoint and help the couple to communicate more effectively. 

Exploring options 

Some unplanned pregnancies can be unexpected blessings, but it may not always be possible to parent a child at this point in your life. If one partner wants to continue with the pregnancy, but another wishes to explore other options such as adoption, it's a good idea to have an open discussion about what this will mean for your relationship. When both partners can discuss why they feel certain about their option, it can help clarify everyone's position and one partner might be more open to the other person's point of view. 

Dealing with changes

A pregnancy can cause some changes to the relationship, from the practical aspects of the changes to the body to financial aspects of needing to take maternity leave and potentially needing to move house through to emotional aspects such as needing to spend time and attention on a new baby (if you choose to parent the child). These changes can be disruptive and one partner may deal with some aspects better than the other partner. Counselling can help you discuss these changes and deal with any stress that they may bring up in a proactive way. 

An unexpected pregnancy can place a strain on a relationship and often both partners have different reactions to the news. Getting relationship counselling can be useful to help you work through the practical and emotional issues with solid communication.